My new car!

So we finally replaced Mike's truck that was totaled in March. Instead of replacing the truck, we decided to go ahead and get something more family/dog friendly since my Outback has a lot of miles. All of our family lives far away so we need something big enough to accommodate Piper and all of her accessories plus 2 big dogs and all of our stuff. Mini-vans were not an option. Mike refuses to ever own one and I just couldn't bring myself to drive one.

I thought I had settled on a Chrysler Pacifica because it was AWD and roomy enough for our needs. Mike wasn't impressed but was apathetic. It bugged me that he didn't want the car, too. Even though it was supposed to be the family car, I wanted him to approve, or at least care about, what we picked because he is the one working to pay for it. We kinda got into an argument over it because he didn't think I had explored my options enough not realizing how many hours I had spent looking at used and new cars over the internet trying to find the right vehicle at the right price. I wasn't settling on cars based on the internet alone, but it was certainly narrowing things down for me. Car shopping doesn't have to be just going to dealer to dealer anymore.

Once we got to the dealership, there happened to be a Jeep Commander parked nearby that was on sale. This isn't something we considered, but I got excited immediately. The Pacifica was a good choice, but the Jeep may be a better one. After a test drive of both vehicles and a drive around town in our own car discussing the decision, we chose the Jeep.

First, it was just cooler. I shouldn't still think that way, but I do. It also fit all of our needs and Mike won't be embarrassed to drive it. Plus, I realized if Mike wanted to take his fishing boat out with the family we would have to take 2 vehicles because the old Dodge can't have a car seat in it and the Pacifica can't tow. We also live in Montana. How are we supposed to enjoy Montana as a family without a vehicle that can go into the mountains? The price was also just right. Even with a 5-year extended warranty, we got it for Blue Book price.

The only downside to the Jeep is the gas mileage because it is full-time 4WD and 8cyl. We are compensating for that by Mike commuting in the Subaru and the Jeep being my primary vehicle. I walk everywhere in Belgrade, only need a vehicle when I go in to Bozeman. There is a gauge that tells you your current mpg so that may make me more aware of my speeding ways and help me slow down to get better gas mileage.

The Jeep the nicest and lowest mileage vehicle I have ever owned. I think our little argument prior to the trip to the dealer sent up the rockets of desire that were necessary for us to both get what we wanted. Yep, I love our new Jeep.

When did I get old?

I know I am not THAT old, but it seems like adulthood kinda sneaked up on me. I think this "grown-up" status is yet another thing that was thrust upon me when I became a parent that I wasn't exactly prepared for. It's not that I was immature and what I am feeling is kinda hard to articulate. I guess you could say I have had a serious change in perspective and I am still getting accustomed to this new view.

It's interesting to remember my parents at my age. My parents were young parents so it's not that hard to remember. My mom actually found out she had breast cancer when she was my age. My parents seemed so "grown-up", not a young bone left in their body. Now that I am that age, it astonishes me that I still feel so young. Most people think I am younger than I am, I still get ID'd buying wine about 50% of the time. I know I don't look that young, but it's been kinda flattering.

I have seen a change in the way that I am viewed now that I have a child of my own , especially with coworkers. I have worked with a lot of college students since I have been in Montana. Prior to becoming a mom, I was more like a peer in a big sister sort of way. There are new people around since I took my extended maternity leave. Upon returning, I felt a bit of an automatic dismissal with these new people. No one was unfriendly, but it seemed like they weren't expecting to have much in common with me. I was now the stay-at-home mom that works part-time at a restaurant. It was interesting to be viewed through that narrow lens.

I am not sure why I wanted their validation, I suppose it's the girl in me that's always wanted to fit in. It has been nice telling them I have a Master's Degree, I have had a "real job", I have my own jewelry business and actually do sell (one of them had actually purchased a pair of earrings not knowing it was me). I only work at the GranTree because it's convenient, mostly on my terms, and very lucrative. Once they got to know me, it has completely changed. I have really come to appreciate my coworkers, especially the young guys. They really make me laugh and make me thankful that I am married to a "grown-up".

Being thankful....

I recently read this quote and it has stuck with me enough to not delete the email it came in.

The unthankful heart discovers no mercies; but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings! — Henry Ward Beecher

I also read a story tonight about middle-class women in Santa Barbara living in their cars due to fallout of the recession. Most have pets. There is no low-income housing in the area and sleeping in cars is illegal, but so many people have been forced into living in their cars that the city is changing their laws to allow people to sleep in parking lots. People are screened and no alcohol or drugs so it's a safe haven, at least as far as living in your car is concerned.

This also makes me wonder why I know this is happening, but it takes seeing a picture of a woman bedded down with her 2 Golden Retrievers in the back of her Subaru to finally hit a heart chord. The aforementioned quote came back to me again and inspired me to express what I am thankful for, despite my own poopy attitude towards some things lately. So I am now going to express some things I am thankful for. When you recognize the good things in your life, they can only expand. I don't do enough of that.

I am thankful that we can afford for me to be a stay-at-home mom. It's not where I pictured myself to be and it certainly hasn't been easy, but I wouldn't change it for the world. We also live in an expensive area. It may be Montana and we still live outside of Bozeman, but the cost of living is still comparable to major metro areas in the US.

I am thankful for the nice home we own. It's been meant to be from the start in so many ways - it found us, after all. I love that we moved here just in time. A year or two later, this home would have been out of our price range. I love that despite the downturn in the national housing market, we are capable of refinancing lowering the interest rate on our mortgage.

I love that I have a beautiful, easy-going little girl and the changes thrust upon me when I became a mother. I find ways to love her even more with each passing day. All of the issues I have had since I have become a parent have been MY issues, not anything directly because of Piper. I have learned, and I am continuing to learn so much about myself. It's not all pretty, but recognition of a problem is the first step towards fixing it.

I am thankful for the relief that comes from making a decision, especially when it comes to sacrifice. I have had to give up a lot of my creative time since Piper became mobile. My creative time is time to make the jewelry that I do actually sell. I had already decided to scale back my summer sales ambitions partly due to Piper, partly due to my transition to working with metal clay which is much more involved than beading. I recently decided to give up on the big show I do for 3 days in Livingston. I have done it the last 2 years and it has been my most profitable show because of sales, booth fee, and close proximity. The stress of building silver inventory in time to even apply for this and other juried shows (I have to have professional-ish photos to submit) while trying to tend to a toddler ready to walk any day - well it just wasn't worth it. Once I finally gave in and realized it wasn't going to be the end of the world to give up yet another thing I loved because I'm a parent now - a wave of relief swept over me. I knew it was the best decision. I am now hoping this will light the fire beneath me to approach some more shops to consign in.

I am thankful that I have survived the last 7 days without Mike without a meltdown. He'll be back tomorrow. I am excited to see Piper's reaction to him. Last time he was out of town for nearly 3 weeks so she was a little unsure when she first saw him.

I am thankful to have our bed to myself (except Gypsy) one more night. It's hard to believe I have a king-size mattress some nights between Mike and the dog..

G'night.

"Spring" in Montana?

It was snowing here just a week ago. Today it is supposed to be 88 degrees. Don't know how I am going to like it. 88 is much more easy to deal with if you've warmed up to it, so to speak, as opposed to going from early-spring weather right into mid-summer temps. It's kind of like the frog in the boiling pot of water analogy. Mike's working in eastern Montana this week where it will likely hit 100. His crews got snowed out of this area less than two weeks ago. Roads in and out of some towns were actually closed due to snow. People said Utah weather was unpredictable - they haven't lived in Montana.

I am just happy spring is finally here. I am itching to get my garden planted and I love seeing leaves on the trees in my yard. I am also looking forward to teaching Piper an appreciation of flowers.

Montana summers are intense, but fleeting. I better start enjoying it now before it snows again.

Today in the Police Reports

I make a point to read the Police Reports in the Bozeman Daily Chronicle because they are almost always entertaining. The Police Dept. surely receives more calls than what are published. You can also tell that those that are published are often picked for a reason. An entry in today's paper was a prime example.

"A man pooped in front of a business on West Main St." Yep, that's what it said.

The image that came into mind was not necessarily one I had wanted to imagine, but a little funny nonetheless. I couldn't help but wonder what drove this man to express himself in such a manner, how a person could settle up with themselves in their head and still do such a thing.

It takes all kinds, this world.